What made my day today(:

Okay.. So today I'm in NY for my sister's graduation, and i DID get to do insanity, as i will be ablet o tomorrow too, even tho tomorrow's supposed to be recovery.

Yeah.. I ate a lot today.. and felt fat, as usual(feeling fat part that is).   I wore a shirt I wasn't too comfortable in bc i look rly fat, but everyone else thinks I'm' cray cray. so i was like whatever, maybe i should get over it, not care too much if i look a little big, but i don't want to not care to the point where I would ACTUALLY LOOK MASSIVE AND NOT CARE. that's just ridiculous and would no way happen.  I felt so uncomfortable wearing that shirt, it's not like it was tight, it's just unflattering. idk.

idk if that's helping or making things worse.

ANYWAY

THIS IS WHAT MADE MY DAY

i feel so fat today, and my little sister is a good amount inches taller than me, and practically the same weight as me, which means she's a toothpick.  I've always been jealous of her size, but I'm a lot more physically fit than her.  But today I asked her, what do you honestly think of how i look? I don't care if you say i'm big or flabby, bc that's how i feel anyway.

She told me she thought my legs were small. My bf tells that to me all the time but i never believe it because i know he knows that i'm pretty self conscious.  But that made my day.  My SKINNY sister thinks my legs are small!!!! That's when i thought, maybe they are.. i just always hope they don't mean short because I'm definitely short.  I don't want chub legs, and i want to get rid of all the fat on my stomach, and thighs and well everywhere but one step at a time.


well i still want to be smaller. no matter how optimistic my post might seem, I always want to get smaller. that will never change